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✨Happy Monday Dreamers✨. .
Let’s talk about comfort zone for a minute shall we. A couple years ago I hired my friends and choreographers @cloahmovement to help me with a film audition where I was required to dance! First of all anyone who knows me knows “I can’t dance” but after working with these two and a few woman to woman pep talks on the floor from @clauderacinevalinsky5 I booked that job!! So when my girl hit me up to take her Zero F*CKS Intensive workshop I was like hell yeah, it looks so fun and cool and empowering but of course my first thought to her was “YES, but you know I’m not a dancer Lol” she said “Girl you have all the skills and this intensive is for EVERY WOMAN!” .
She was right. I signed up because I knew I was going to be lost and uncomfortable, it was something totally new for me and I thought why the hell not, what could go wrong when you get out of your head and into your body. I was surrounded by 13 other beautiful women who are classically trained dancers. Of course I was uncomfortable, of course it was challenging, of course I was nervous but not once did I feel unsafe or insecure. It was about owning who you are and being unapologetically free and sexy in your own body! I learned that the dance world and acting world are pretty much the same. We’re all hustlers, we’re all going through it! And these ladies I had the honor to dance next to, wow, y’all are truly incredible inside and out. Thank you for lifting eachother up in that room! ❤️ Thank you Claude, for opening the door to this amazing opportunity! Today I am a stronger woman because of what I learned from you in those four days. I am so proud of what you are doing! I recommend this workshop to every single woman I know! It’s crazy to look back and think, I would have NEVER done this years ago “omg how embarrassing” but today its like, YEP this is ME! Take it or leave it, I’ll be okay with or without you 😘 Today I am forever grateful, more than you will ever know! I have found a new creative outlet in dance and I am so proud to say that I CAN dance dammit!! 💃🏾💃🏾
❗️Get out of your comfort zone❗️
🐻 w/ me as I attempt to put this into words.... Creative life is hard.
A creative heart is one most often worn on the sleeve. A creative mind is one that listens to the creative heart even when maybe more logical things like survival come to play. I was born with both of these things- and it has proven to be quite the struggle for me. I am rebellious in that my work doesn’t fit into a box or a jewel toned dress. My work doesn’t fit into a 30-60 second time frame. I don’t like to audition because of it. I don’t like to put my name on a list and sit in a sweaty room of nervous energy to hopefully be cast and be able to put “actor” on my tax returns. My work is worth so much more to me than that. My search for joy and for truth and for specificity are worth more to me than that. But I constantly ask myself- am I doing enough? Do I audition enough? I could follow rules if I wanted and probably book...so why don’t I? I usually end up walking into an audition room in jeans and converse and doing something unexpected. (off the record has gotten me more callbacks) but how is there not room for that in successful theater??? My mind remains boggled. But here’s the thing: there is.
I recently took a chance, and sent in a self tape for a sketch comedy troupe. Per usual, I did something odd and weird and silly for my audition. I ended up booking it.
But here’s the funny thing I found:
That I am not the only talented person with rebellion against the “man” that is the theater business. I am not the only one who longs for real, deeply funny, rich work and I am certainly not the only one with my heart on my sleeve. YES there is room for self made work. YES there are people who want to see it. YES there is a life outside of 16 bar cuts.
Thank you to my people who came, and especially the people I got the absolute joy of sharing the stage with. I literally cannot wait to create with you all again.
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