Of course he doesn't respond that day. Did we think he would?? The next day I get a text explaining why he left. Um, yes, motherfucker, I know. We've been over this part. Still doesn't answer the question if there is anyone else. I tell him he should have just been honest about dating someone now. (In all honesty, as much as I'd love for you guys to hate him like I do, I don't think there was anyone else when he was with me) I can deal with a lot of things. Fucking obviously. And to a fault. But, not lying. This narcissistic, sociopathic, gas lighting piece of shit says - "I was honest with you. I told you why I vanished and that I wasnt looking for anything more right now." Wrong, Cocksucker!! That was a lie of ommission. You specifically left out an important fact to foster misconception. I tell him I'm done but ask if I can have one more answer. (My question being, why did you agree to meet me on Monday?) He says possibly. I say fuck off. 🖕🏼✌🏼 #marriage#divorce#redflags#relationships#relationshipgoals#closure#heartbreak#toxic#toxicrelationships#narcissist#blame#sociopath#gaslighting
#bigfacts Fellas, let’s not fall into this black hole. No one cares about your “ex”, move on!
Also, if she starts talking about her “ex”, dead it...run the other way.
If you get to know each other and go out on a few dates and the subject happens to come up, that’s fine BUT not on the first date.
Get to know each other and connect on an emotional, intelligent level and see where it goes from there! 💯 #havefun#woome
Why do I continue to fucking deal with this man? Of course there were good times. If not, I wouldn't have fallen in love. People say love is hard work. And I agree, maintaining it is. But falling? That is the easiest thing in the world. Effortless. We weren't even a year in, so I why did I feel like I was working so hard to save something that shouldn't have been difficult. I have a nagging gut feeling. Again. That I haven't paid attention to in the past. This time, I do. So, I finally ask, Why are you acting so odd? Is there someone else? There is. 🤬🚩💔 #marriage#divorce#redflags#relationships#relationshipgoals#closure#heartbreak#toxic#toxicrelationships#narcissist#blame
Love Rat message... Just a heads up... I been messaged a few times by dodgey guys.
They follow heaps of women and have only about 5 or 6photos usually with same date stamp posted within same day.
One quickly told me his wife and kid died 2years ago and hes on instagram looking for longterm love relationship...!! 😱😎
I had barelybexchanged many messages with him. He only messages a few days ago. I was suspect from the start
I told him he was B. S.
smelt like a rat to me. Redflags.
Johndonaldson something and theres josh martino. Someone.
Be careful. I know you guys are smart.
Just wanted to do a quick post. If its too good to be true prob is.
👂🏾👂🏾👂🏾It’s these situations that have you acting different and all out of character sis...hunting for clues and drowning out what he’s actually telling you, overmessaging (texting, emailing all the time), snooping, or even downright stalking...am I right?
So much of this is love is about indecision and unwillingness to walk away despite all the red flags and warning signs...allowing your mind to play tricks on you and causing you to look and listen for exactly what you’re hoping to see and hear from your unavailable bae over reality.
Girl, it takes courage and clarity to walk away from someone who can’t or won’t love you back…and that clarity is hard to come by when you’re caught in the heavy and intoxicating whirlwind of romantic love.
LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE and don’t waste your time, love or energy the moment you realize someone doesn’t have the desire to reciprocate that.
We text back and forth, making plans for Monday. I say things like, "It will be nice to see you." And "I'm glad we will get to talk in person." He dismisses those texts but continues to talk about other things. Still friendly. But, another red flag. I'm more cautious this time. So I ask if everything is ok. He says "I'm just really having a hard time with you hanging out with my friend. Like really tough." I feel horrible. I'm truly sorry and I tell him that. I seem to forget the fact that he ghosted me for over two months without a second thought. At this point, I'm distraught because I feel like I hurt him. What the fuck?? Now, again, I blame myself. 😔🚩 #marriage#divorce#redflags#relationships#relationshipgoals#closure#heartbreak#toxic#toxicrelationships#narcissist#blame
This right here!
Credit to @noblenav : We need to end the stigma that PTSD/CPTSD is specific to war veterans. Trauma doesn’t only happen on a battlefield. PTSD/CPTSD is real, it is serious, and it is very common in the community of narcissistic abuse survivors. It took me a while to accept my therapist’s claim that what I was experiencing was, in fact, PTSD. But eventually I came around and agreed with her. She wasn’t wrong.
I had a VERY long list of triggers and the attacks were paralyzing. I developed every single symptom on this list, plus a sporadic hypersensitivity to sound. The triggers and the symptoms got so bad I didn’t feel safe going outside. So then I developed agoraphobia. (Couldn’t catch a break.) If/when I left my apartment, it took me 4-5 hours of rituals to find the courage to open the door. And wherever I went, I had to have a specific group of friends with me that knew my triggers and how to handle them/me during an attack.
The PTSD, the agoraphobia, and my bond with my incredibly patient/encouraging friends that basically earned degrees as trauma-informed specialists for me during this experience, is actually what led me to start a network of in-person meet ups in NYC. Which then led me to expanding to this online community. Which is now growing into something much bigger than I ever imagined. (Fucking wild. 🙏🏼)
My point: the PTSD is real. Don’t be like me and try to ignore it. Don’t be ashamed of it. Learn your triggers and how to manage them. Share your triggers with your loved ones so they can help you. Your PTSD symptoms don’t have to last a lifetime. You can heal them. For me, I needed to do a lot of traditional therapy, group therapy, guided meditation, narrative therapy, NLP reframing, affirmations, and music therapy but there are tons of other modalities to test. There’s a really great chapter on PTSD healing strategies in Shahida Arabi’s book Power: Surviving and Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse that I would strongly suggest for more information. 💛🦋